On the first day of foreign language class in high school, my teacher walked in and started talking entirely in Spanish. My classmates and I looked at each other nervously, wondering if we would ever get the hang of this.
That’s kind of how I felt when my husband came home from boot camp and started talking about the logistics of military life. PCS, Tricare, TMO, TI, leave, LES, A1C, commissary, BX and PT.
Huh? Back up, Teach, I’m already confused.
Even after 10 years, I still stop my husband in the middle of a story about his day and say, “Wait, wait, what?! What does that even mean?” Thankfully, he’s a patient person, because it happens all too often. For example, military time? Don’t get me started, it still baffles me. Everyone always screams at you to simply subtract 12, but, you know what’s even easier? Using my Military Time Converter app on my phone.
For newbie spouses, though, there are several words, phrases and acronyms (I loathe acronyms, thanks to the military; I rarely even use "ASAP" anymore, because I’m so sick of acronyms!) that will make adjusting to military life easier if you just learn them in the beginning.
I’ll start with some of the good ones.
Military Lingo for New Military SpousesLeave: Glorified word for “vacation.” Our spouses belong to the military so, when they are granted permission, they are allowed to leave, and go where they want. Depending on the installation commander, troops under a certain age may need to fill out additional paperwork, or have extra restrictions, but for the most part, being on leave = freedom. Just, make sure to come back. If they don’t, then they’re AWOL: Absent Without Leave. And, that’s bad.
PCS: You’ll wonder how three little letters can inflict so much emotion. You’ll get excited, nervous, scared, sad, anxious, worried, excited again, nervous again and then exhausted. And that’s just in the first day after your spouse comes home with the news that, yep—you’re moving again. S/he’s getting a Permanent Change of Station, and you’ll be headed across the state, across the country or across the world. This is the ‘travel’ part of the military everyone is always talking about. Love it or hate it, it’s happening. So, might as well try to love it.
Making rank: Promotion! Time to break out the champagne, because your spouse is moving on up to the big time! This mean extra pay, an extra stripe and extra responsibilities. Did we mention extra pay?
LES: This is a Leave and Earnings Statement. It tells your spouse everything they need to know about their pay twice a month. It details their taxes, their available days of leave and any allotments (automatic withdrawals from their paycheck to any place they might designate) they may have.
“Go Army. Beat Navy.” or “Go Navy. Beat Army.": Annual college football game when the U.S. Naval Academy plays West Point Military Academy, and the military community splits in two for about three hours. Also: super cheesy/funny "spirit videos" are produced, usually by the Navy. The Army's videos are usually not as fancy.
(Editor Amy's note: The Army is busy defending America so they don't have time to make high-gloss videos. Go Army. Beat Navy.)
Commissary: Grocery store. Simple as that. Don’t go on payday. Trust me.
Shoppette: Gas station. Oh, and the place to buy wine (and liquor, beer, chips and snacks).
Class Six: Alcohol store. Very important. Why is it called that? No idea.
DFAC: Where your service member might eat breakfast.
Bonus tip -- here's a military word you're going to really hate:Deployment: You’ve never wanted to cuss out a word until you hear this one fall out of your spouse’s mouth. It’s inevitable, but never welcomed. This is any time away from their permanent duty station in a hostile environment overseas. It can last any length of time, depending on the branch and job and deployment detail. Afghanistan? Deployment. Korea? Not a deployment. Anywhere stateside? Not a deployment (unless they are National Guard and responding to an emergency).
Everything other word can be gotten used to, made better by taking a different perspective, or enjoyed after experience (truly, you can learn to enjoy the commissary, I promise, just not on payday!).
You will learn to navigate this strange new world of going through gates guarded by military police before making it to your house, and whole sentences full of acronyms and weird words. Before you know it, you’ll be using those weird words yourself, and your family will look at you strangely and ask for a translation.
Welcome to military life. We’re weird. And awesome.