SpouseBuzz

7 Things You Forgot About Your Military Spouse

My Army husband recently came back from a long TDY separation. And he returned in just the nick of time as my two young cherubs danced on my very last string of sanity.

forgot-about-servicemember

Now that we have gotten through the first wonderful days where it’s all swooning over how effortlessly he takes out the trash and my love for the glory that is someone else administering bath time has no bounds, I’m starting to notice … things.

You know, the all but universal realities of living with a military man. I adore this man. I want, nay NEED, him home. But ...

I got to thinking that perhaps you, too, have recently welcomed home a long-lost-love and can relate. Or maybe, instead, you are getting ready for that happy day and could use a warning.

Yes, a warning. Because in the glow of homecoming we forget the tarnish of reality.

 7 Things You Forgot About Your Military Spouse

1. Military stuff stinks. And it’s not just a “let’s toss this in the wash with some extra Tide” kind of stink. It’s more like a “maybe we should just give-up and burn this” stink.

2. Boots are dirt magnets. I think it’s the crevices on the bottom that are the real problem. I know he doesn’t mean to leave little bits of the training area in my bathroom. But it happens anyway.

3. Service members eat A TON. My husband puts the Very Hungry Caterpillar to shame. I only THOUGHT I had purchased enough at the commissary last week. Wrong!

4. Military people get up really early. I’m an early riser. But since no one is actually forcing me to get up at any given hour, when I’m tired I just sleep in. My spouse? Not so much. He is up at 0430 every. single. workday.

5. His pockets are always full of pens that explode in the washing machine. Why can’t I just remember to check them myself? And, seriously, why so many pens? I'm a professional writer. Not once have I had a pen in my pocket in the wash. So why does he?

6. Everything is Hooah. Or Oo-rah, or Hooyah or whatever it is your service says that is something between a grunt and a cheer and means “very yes.” This is especially true after he has spent a lot of time doing hooah stuff without his family. It takes him awhile to realize that in the real world, yes, some things are not hooah.

7. Nothing sucks as much as the thing he just did. Nothing. This is good. Because while you are thinking “wow it’s hot outside today,” he is thinking “this is like a vacation because I’m not wearing body armor.”

What are some things that never fail to surprise you when your service member comes home? Tell us in the comments!

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