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Military Wife Quotes: 'Blorft' is an Adjective I Just Made Up

Every morning I wake up, drink some coffee and gird my loins for the day to come.

Because in military life, especially, there’s no telling what kind of crazy any day will bring. What time will my husband come home? (Who knows!) What moving-related misadventure will we find ourselves in today? (It’s anyone’s guess!).  Will my babysitter bail on me during a critical work event over which I cannot count on my spouse for help? (It’s possible!)

Sure, there are times when the stress of military life leaves me looking for a corner where I can hold myself and cry. Most of the time, however, I swallow it and do my best to proceed with a “business as usual sort of air.”

The rest of the time, according to Tina Fey, I am ‘blorft.’

‘Blorft’ is an adjective I just made up that means ‘Completely overwhelmed but proceeding as if everything is fine and reacting to the stress with the torpor of a possum.’ I have been blorft every day for the past seven years.  – Tina Fey
Tina Fey, the actress behind 30 Rock's Liz Lemon, just kills me with her hilarious spin on reality. Which is why it’s no surprise that I thought “that’s exactly it!” when I saw ‘blorft.’”

‘Blorft’ is practically my middle name.

And it is the middle name of most military spouses I’ve met.

Remember the time your spouse was supposed to deploy in a month but left that day instead? Blorft.

Or that time you came home from a month long vacation to find your home infested with ticks? Blorft.

Or the time you rented a house from across the country only to discover when the movers arrived that your furniture didn't fit through the door? Blorft.

(All of the above are actual examples military spouses I know have dealt with this very week).

We are blorft like it is our job.

So as you tackle yet another day full of unpredictable weirdness, remember to keep calm and, well, blorft.

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