Dear Army: Why Isn't our Birthday Cool Like the Corps'?


I’m a proud Army wife, so I know when Army people get excited about stuff.

Examples of things that are a big deal to Army folks: no longer wearing the beret all the time, the move to nine month deployments, the time one of our unit’s majors punched one of the colonels in the face.

Example of something that do not seem to be a big deal: the Army's birthday.

This week is the Army’s 237th birthday. That was news to me. Why? Because no one invited me to an Army birthday party. No one offered to feed me Army birthday cake. And if they sing “Happy Birthday, dear Army” I’ve certainly never been a part of it.

One of the fancy things about SpouseBuzz is that I get to hang out (at least virtually) with people from all five military branches – including the Marine Corps. And I’ve noticed something about those Marine Corps types: their service birthday, which is in November, is a huge – and I mean HUGE – deal.

They have a party. The spouses get to buy and wear a fancy dress to the birthday ball. They eat cake. And I’m not entirely sure about this, but there might even be singing.

Why don’t we get to sing?

Now, I know the Army hosts a birthday ball here and there across the country. Extra important people get to attend and wear their fancy clothes.  But I am not extra important. And I have never been to such a shindig.

But in the Marine Corps you don’t have to be at all special or anywhere near sober to attend the party. You just have to be interested.

In High School only the really cool kids got mega parties thrown for their birthdays every year. And since the whole world is a microcosm of High School I wanna know – is the Army just not as cool as the Marine Corps? What’s the deal, Army folks?

P.S. My husband just informed me that the Army's birthday IS a big deal. "If there wasn't an Army birthday there would be NO AMERICA," he says.  (I'm not entirely sure what his point is with that). OK. So why don't we get to party?!


See this thing these good looking folks are standing in front of? That would be a TANK made up of CUPCAKES. And that is cool. A cupcake tank? Common. Top that, Leathernecks! Now, as MANSpouse Wayne would say, go make us a sammich.

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