This post is for the spouses who went home for support during deployment, and didn’t find it. Some people will never ‘get it.’ They can be very hurtful with their words. Even people in your own family.
“You knew this would happen when you married him.”“Did you see on the news that x-amount of soldiers were killed today?”
“Why are you so depressed?”
You went there for support. Maybe for some help with the kids, or a distraction from his absence and it’s just not working out the way you thought it would.
First, release yourself from ‘making’ them understand. You have enough to deal with, enough to worry about and you’re trying to stay happy. Find some fun and happiness. There may be other military spouses at your temporary place who can relate and help ease the stress. If not, find online sites that are a good fit for you.Once upon a time, I went home. I was 18 years-old and a freshly-minted Marine wife. My situation was different. My family was a 30-year Army family with a dash of Vietnam tossed in.
Because of the internet, I see that some spouses choose to go home during deployments and some encounter a surprising lack of support from friends and/or family. It’s disheartening to see this. Family can show love in a ‘tough’ way or they can just be insensitive.
Whatever the case is for each spouse living with this additional stress, if a sit-down talk with your family doesn’t help, don’t beat yourself up.
Better days are coming.
And you've always got your internet friends!
