The Angry Stage of Deployment


I was chatting with a group of women yesterday, and the only other military spouse asked how R&R went. I replied that I was glad that I had gotten over the angry stage of deployment before my husband came home - that would have been terrible timing. The civilian women looked confused, and I guess that it might be confusing to them. To be honest, I hadn't recognized it as a stage until this time. And maybe I'm the only person who has them (but I'm guessing not.) The other military spouse knew exactly what I was talking about.

You know the time: probably at least a few months in, more likely somewhere past the half-way point, where your previously optimistic attitude deserts you and you are just mad. Mad that military, mad at your spouse, mad at the whole situation. I think it is normal to have this as a stage. I don't personally think it is normal to feel this way the whole time, and I'd be seriously looking for some counseling if I felt that way all the time. (That just can't be healthy.) Heck, I have been going to counseling since before mt husband left, as preventative medicine, and it seems to be working so far.

I'm not saying that you have to have an angry stage, and I've been curiously considering the other possible stages. I bet between the SB readers we could teach a whole class on the stages of deployment.

So, what do you think?

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