The Milspouse Lens


As the end of 2008 draws ever closer, I realized that being a military spouse has created yet another noticeable difference in the way I operate. I bet it has for you too.

You know those experiences where you're told, "You'll never do/watch/think X the same way again thanks to Y." For me, it's been things like "You'll never watch TV again now that you've gone to law school." Or, "You don't know the level of love possible for a pet until you lose him."

Once I became a military spouse, lots of things changed. I don't listen to the radio in the same way, for instance. I sometimes find myself thinking, "I wonder if this song was written with military families in mind?" and adding it to the mental list of songs to avoid if I don't want to cry.

CalendarAs I look forward to turning over our 2008 calendar to the fresh pages of 2009, I realized that being a military spouse has created yet another lens through which I can view life's experiences. I remember the great anticipation of tearing the 2004 calendar's December page and getting on with 2005 because that meant my husband would be coming home from our first lengthy deployment. I remember never being so glad to tear a page off my huge desk calendar. Now, we're on the same timetable, but headed in a different direction.

Rather than anticipating a return, I'm dreading a departure.

I'm looking at the holidays and trying to make them memorable and meaningful because I know next year will be difficult for all of us. Where I usually look forward to crossing off these final days in a year and moving into the next, I find myself wondering why things have to go so quickly?

And then, I remember.

Somewhere, there is another military spouse wondering why these last days are taking so long and why can't 2009 just start already so his/her loved one can come home.

I know I haven't looked at the turning of a calendar's page in quite the same way since becoming a military spouse.

How has the milspouse lens focused the way you view certain things? Share in comments!

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