Today I needed to call my friend's mother to ask her for a recipe. I looked at the clock and thought, "My husband never contacts me at this time, so I'll call my friend's mom now." So naturally, my husband was trying to beep in while I was taking down recipe information. And it's awkward to tell a woman you've never talked to before that you need to hang up on her and call her back in a few minutes. But it's even worse to miss a call from Iraq.
My husband keeps a pretty regular deployment schedule, and he usually gets on the computer when he's done with his work in Iraq. That means that he's more or less online at the same time of the day. Last week I started hanging around the computer around that time, knowing that he might pop in. I knew that if I went to the bathroom or went outside to get the mail, that would be when he'd get online. He showed up over an hour later. Because he went to get a cheeseburger. That's a long time to hover around the computer.
I am grateful to have any contact with him whatsoever. This is not meant to be a post complaining about when my husband calls me, because I love the frequent contact and we sure didn't have this during the last deployment. But I did have this thought today: I wonder what it would be like if the tables were turned. All of our contact is done on HIS schedule. When he's free, when he can use the phone, when he is not standing in line at the Air and Space Museum. Just sometimes, I'd like to be able to contact him on MY schedule.
Because sometimes it's hard to hide the annoyance. After sitting there for an hour waiting for him to show up, I was exasperated that I took second place to the cheeseburger. It doesn't make for a very loving IM. And today I felt embarrassed about cutting short a conversation with a very nice woman. I felt like a jerk asking for special treatment in line at the museum too. Oh, and there was the one time he called while I was in the self-checkout at Walmart and I was so flustered trying to finish paying and juggle the phone that I walked out and drove away without my purchase...and looked for those batteries for two days before I realized I had left them in the store.
It sure would be nice to sit quietly on the sofa and pick up the phone to call him. And some days, when I'm feeling especially vindictive, I think it would be nice to make him wait an hour by the computer for me to eat a cheeseburger.