Probably the silliest problem I have when hubby is deployed is which movies I can and can't watch. It's enough to drive many of my friends (civilian, of course) batty. In fact, just last weekend my sister and I headed out for a night on the town (which, at my age - 32 - and marital status, means a sinful dessert, a movie, and in bed at the LATE time of 10:30) and spent twenty minutes driving the guy at the ticket counter nuts as we perused the synopses of available flicks.
My sister was absolutely exasperated as I looked at one movie after another and pronounced them unfit. What she couldn't grasp was the reasoning behind my yes and no answers - I said yes to some movies with steamy scenes and no to some movies without. The actual story line was secondary, really. And some movies are fairly obviously off limits for me - We Were Soldiers, for instance. But not all of them are that straight forward.
So, to make things a little easier, I tried to give up some examples:
Top Gun: Most definitely NO. I can't even hear that theme song! Especially not with multiple LOOOONG months left before hubby returns. It may be a movie about Navy pilots, but it strikes a chord, and that chord is best not resonated when I'm going through a period of enforced celibacy.
Falling Down: This is actually a very therapeutic movie for me to watch. I often feel like I would like to start on the bureaucracy with a baseball bat.
Office Space: Yes. See above.
Tombstone: Yes. I like to see bad guys get what they deserve.
The Omen: No. Double No. Have you ever met my children? Somethings just hit too close to home.
So, anyway, I tried to explain through example, but it really didn't seem to work. For instance, my sister wasn't quite sure why we could go see "Black Dahlia" when there are some quite steamy scenes involving Hillary Swank and Josh Hartnett (the enforced celibacy, remember?). But that one seems so obvious to me - the lack of sparks would make those scenes safe for viewing in a field of overripe corn in the middle of a hot July with no rain for six weeks.
But in all honesty, I think the question that most people can't get past is why in the Sweet Mother of Mercy I'm concerned about movies when there are so many other things that seem to be much bigger problems to contend with.
The answer is very simple. Big problems I can deal with. The car engine falls out and I need to get a tow and a new car loan? That's okay - there's nothing I can do to change the situation, I have to deal with it. My Mother-in-Law chooses this moment to be diagnosed with early stage Alzheimers? Once again - what good would being flustered do in this situation?
Nothing. So there's no point. We deal with things because we have to. That's what life has thrown at us.
But movies... that I can control. And if feels GOOD to be able to control something. So I control it with relish. I'm the Movie Nazi, the Spoiler of All Nights Out, the Dictator of the Admissions Tickets, the Sultan of Sub-plots.
And my sanity survives intact.