It’s the second week of January and the gym seems to be about back to normal.
The weather is getting there, so take advantage of drawing d*cks in the snow while you can. Looking at you, Navy.
13. "But the Marines took a lot of little islands!” — “We took a lot of little countries."
(Image via Army as F*ck)
12. Pick something that has a weak enough scent that whatever you mix it in will over power it (like rum in a coke) and sip from it all day.
Everyone below E5, and most LTs. (Image via Army as F*ck)
11. "I keep paying $20 towards it a month. Why does it keep going up?"
We told you not to buy that stupid TV. (Image via Army as F*ck)
10. The PX barbershop only ever gives, like, four or five different haircuts. And yet they f*ck them all up.
Now you’re *really* not getting laid this weekend. (Image via Army as F*ck)
9. If a girl in a bikini can get 10,000+ likes, how many can we get for our homeless veterans?
Make it rain, America. (Image via ASMDSS)
8. Since it’s the same four HDDs floating around, that means you probably re-downloaded the same videos at least twice by now…
You’re gross and we’re all judging you. (Image via Decelerate Your Life)
7. 'But Sergeant! I need you to-"
Back away slowly. Don’t make eye contact. (Image via Decelerate Your Life)
6. "Hearts and minds," right? Two in the heart. One in the mind.
Double-tap so terrorists know you care. (Image via Military Memes)
5. If the Coast Guard goes to the range more than you do, you’re a super POG.
Semper Paratus. (Image via Military Memes)
4. Whatever you say, Staff Sergeant. Your neckline can only help you out so much.
January PT hurts. (Image via Pop Smoke)
3. It’s even worse if you’re drunk.
You’re probably why we even have safety briefs. (Image via Pop Smoke)
2. Can’t tell which one gave the least amount of f*cks: the NCO who signed off on the original DA 5988-E or the mechanic that typed it up.
It’s next to the adjustable powerband. (Image via USAWTFM)
1. Looks like an ingenious plan but if he got locked in there that CBRN gear will be Hell.
I am begging you to shut those doors. (Image via USAWTFM)
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