Call Both Phones


Dear Husband,

We have been over this a thousand times. If you call the cell phone and there's no answer, either call back in two minutes or call the house phone. But if you leave another message on my cell that you're sad you missed me and will try back in a few days, I will strangle you. Because the only reason I didn't answer is that the cell phone was upstairs, I was downstairs, and I am too pregnant to go running up flights of stairs to dive for the phone. I was right here, in the house, and there's no reason at all that you couldn't have reached me.

Seriously. I will choke you if you don't call both phones next time.


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