Dear Ms. Vicki,
I’ve been married for three years. My husband is in the Army. He’s a very good person. Even when he is far away from me, he always finds ways to talk to me every day.
Until one day he didn’t exist for three weeks. I was so worried about him. I tried to reach his friends, but they always hung up on me.
Then, I opened up my husband’s Skype account and I saw a message from a girl. She was in the Army too. She said they have sex all the time. She said that she likes my husband.
I’m so mad and I don’t know what to do. I almost killed myself, I’m so depressed. I can’t believe that he can do that.
I’m from the Philippines. When my husband came home, he told me about the Army girl. She’s from Fort Knox, Ky. She’s a home wrecker. I can’t accept the fact that an Army woman can do that.
I did my best to be a good wife and to be a good mother. I don’t deserve this. I want her to stop reaching out to my husband. She is still sending emails. My husband and I are trying to work out things again, because we still love each other.
Ma'am, can you help me? Where I can report that woman?
Dear Good Wife,
Please don’t kill yourself! You are right. You don’t deserve to be cheated on. No one deserves that.
Here’s the deal: I don’t think your husband is telling you the truth. The Fort Knox vixen is contacting your husband because she knows she can. Furthermore, he could still be contacting her too and not being honest with you about this.
If your husband wants the vixen home wrecker to leave him alone, then he needs to change his phone number, his email address, and disconnect from Facebook, Twitter and every other social network.
He needs to concentrate on rebuilding the trust with you, his wife. You are trying to be a good mother and wife, and his main objective should be to be a good husband and father.
Your husband needs to cut all ties with her. If he doesn’t, this other woman will assume that your husband is still very interested in her. Moreover, in the future you will have to worry not only about this woman but other women too.
You don’t deserve this, and I really regret this happened. Give your husband my recommendations. I hope he agrees with them.
Dear Ms. Vicki,
My husband wants to transfer his GI Bill benefits over to me so I can go to school. I was told by several people that I would be getting paid monthly to use this source. But I don’t know if it’s true or not. Do you have any information on this? Either way, I’m going to go to school.
Your husband can definitely transfer his GI Bill benefits to you. The amount of your GI Bill will vary based on the number of years of service your husband has and the cost of your tuition. You will also get a book stipend every semester.
When people say you will be getting paid to use this benefit, I assume they are referring to the BAH benefit. However, you qualify for that only if your servicemember is retired or has left the service and is not already receiving BAH.
Please call the VA at 800-827-1000 and ask to speak to someone regarding transfer of the GI Bill benefits. They will tell your husband what he needs to do. You can also check online at www.va.gov.
Hang in there, Victoria!
|Family and Spouse|
Ms. Vicki is a native of Dallas, is married to an active-duty Soldier and has three sons. She has a Master's of Science in Social Work from the University of Louisville, is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker and currently works as a therapist with military servicemembers and their families. She provides services for a wide array of concerns such as combat stress, PTSD, couples and marital problems, depression, grief and loss, stress and coping.
Ms. Vicki also writes an advice column "Dear Ms. Vicki" that appears in the Washington Times, the Fort Campbell Courier and the Heidelberg Herald Post. Ms. Vicki also hosts an internet radio show and blogs on her community site with the Washington Times. If you want to ask Ms. Vicki for advice about your military life, please email her at AskMsVicki@military-inc.com.
If you’ve ever read best-selling author John Gray’s book, Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus, then you know he believes communication styles between men and women differ significantly and it affects everything from emotional needs, to modes of behavior, to coping mechanisms and stress. He also claims these commonly occurring conflicts between men ... Continue Reading