My husband and I disagree on what I should or shouldn’t say in my column or in other areas of my life for that matter. To clarify, I write about my life not his life, but since we’re married my actions affect him.

To frame this conflict correctly, let me point out that my husband and I have opposite personalities. Of course we complement each other in a perfect way, (I being the better half or whole to be politically correct) but are nonetheless different. He’s calm, level headed, patient, and very private. I also have a temper — an Italian one — I’m impulsive, inpatient, and an open book.

I think this happens often with couples. However, I write a column and an uncensored blog full of scandalous details about my secret life as a Ninja’s wife, and my husband wants to establish some boundaries, such as telling me what I should or should not reveal. Ok, let me rephrase this: He suggests rather than tells. And to be fair, this is a very important issue not only for a writer or columnist who reveals personal things, but also for anyone who is affiliated with the military.

Military people, and specifically Ninjas like my husband, must be private. It’s part of the job. They can’t reveal certain aspects of their profession, let alone discuss missions, deployments or anything else that could endanger someone else’s life.

So when it comes to anything related to my husband’s job or specific military matters he’s absolutely correct. I cannot reveal or talk about anything specific. It’s an absolutely cut and dry issue.

But, here is the catch, when it comes to other areas of our lives, really what I write about (After all, I am a “lifestyle columnist” and crazy blogger) I’m not a cut and dry girl, more of a shades of gray type, so it’s all up for grabs. The dirtier the better.

And this is where my husband disagrees. Why air your dirty laundry? Asks the well intentioned and extremely handsome fellow to whom I’m married. Why be subject to hate e-mails or nasty comments, or worse, ridicule by people we know?

And I’m tempted to give in a little — because of his good looks and Ninja powers — but my stubbornness has the better of me. Who cares what other people think? At this point my husband or anyone else may ask, why write a column at all if you don’t care what others think? The reason: It’s awesome to be honest and to let go of all of those games and pretenses of being perfect or to be above and beyond struggles. Really who is? We all have dirty laundry, some more, some less, but it’s all the same.

When I talk about my weaknesses, also masked by my hotness and fantastic personality, people respond and share their own struggles. It makes it so much easier to go through it. And it makes my day when I get a comment form someone who says, “Hey, I also had a pregnant butt and felt terrible about it,” or “I bought McDonalds for my children too many times to count.” And as corny as it sounds, I don’t feel alone anymore.

So, if my column ever ruffles your feathers, try not to start a reply with #$%*& you — I delete these comments without reading. But if the e-mail is at least legible, you may convince me that I’m wrong and help to convert me to your particular creed or religion.

When it comes to my husband I’ll give a little. I’ll never write anything about him unless it somehow relates to me.