Whenever I hear someone say, “Yes, Maam,” or, “No, Sir.” I know that person is either from the South or has been in the Military, and most of the time it is the latter.

One of the things that is very noticeable about most ex-military personnel is that they are very respectful and polite – they have good manners. While that is an admirable trait, to some people you may appear to be overly polite and they may be uncomfortable with your formality.

There is a time and place for everything, and in a job interview being overly polite may keep you from making a good impression.

Here is an example of a problem that you may experience and don’t know how to handle.
“Today I had an interview with a talkative interviewer. In the 30-minute interview, he spent most of the time talking about what job and only asked me a few questions. I don't know why he did that. He did mention that one of the job requirements is an ability to listen. But I wonder how I can tell the interviewer what I have to offer besides the ability  to listen in an interview like this? Should I interrupt him? If so, how?”

First of all, not all interviewers are created equal. There are competent interviewers and there are incompetent interviewers. The interviewer in the above scenario was incompetent. We don’t really know how he judges his candidates and it would appear that he never gives them a chance to describe their abilities and what they can bring to the job.

In these scenarios you may have to jump in as appropriate. This may sound impolite, or even disrespectful, but think of it as being assertive. This person needs your help to let him know who you are and what you have to offer.

One of the best things that you can do is to be prepared. Having your two-minute "personal statement" and your stories ready will allow you to feel equipped and ready to speak up whenever you get the chance.

Sooner or later this talker will have to take a breath. When you see the appropriate opportunity, jump in and say, “What you’re saying really makes me excited about this job…I'd like to tell you how I have handled a similar situation in the past," or "I’d like to tell you about my background and how it relates to your problem here, " or "I have encountered that issue with a project in past work experiences."

I know that this is not easy and that you may feel that you are over-stepping your boundaries, especially if you have lived by the military rules of respect for authority, but it is the only way that you will be able to let your interviewer know who you are and what you have to offer.

In a stressful situation with a talkative interviewer, you should also be ready to jump in when, or if, the interviewer asks you if you have any questions. Here is your chance to show some assertive behavior and you should be ready with questions.

The best questions you can ask are from the information he has given you. For example, you may ask, "You mentioned earlier that you were having a problem with your databases, could you tell me more about that?” or say, "From what you have been talking about, it sounds like you have a problem with your databases. Let me tell you about my successes with dealing with those types of questions.”

These suggestions may not always work – depending on you interviewer and how controlling he is, but at least you won’t feel like you missed your opportunity.

You can also write a dynamite follow up or thank you letter letting him know all the things that you could bring to the job, and why you think you would be a good match for the type of work.

Your follow-up letter could be the tie-breaker between yourself and the other candidates. Put some thought and effort behind what you say. Even if it doesn't get you the job, you’ve given it one last shot. This will be one last opportunity to get the attention of the talker who didn’t bother to listen.