When Gen. Peter Pace, chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff choked back tears during a congressional hearing on immigration last month, his unexpected emotion got me thinking:  Is it okay for men in uniform to cry in public? Or more importantly, are we, as a nation, ready to see our military leaders cry?

I would argue yes, on both accounts. Gen. Pace’s emotion showed that strong men can also be authentic and real men.

Pace, the U.S. military’s top general, broke down while addressing a Senate Armed Services Committee field hearing in Miami on July 10. While reading from a prepared text, Pace talked about his father, an Italian immigrant and the opportunities afforded to his family in America. The audience, which included five senators, sat stunned as the general struggled to continue.

A prominent public figure’s tears are always newsworthy. Slap a uniform and some rank on his shoulders and the tears take on a new dimension. 

"Big Boys Don’t Cry" is a lesson learned at home and in the schoolyard. In many cultures such emotion in men is equated with weakness and vulnerability. Not exactly traits associated with military might. The military further represses emotion by cultivating an unspoken tradition of a "zero defect mentality" within its ranks. I call it the no-chinks-in-the-armor facade.

Years ago, while deployed with troops in Albania, I interviewed soldiers about their families back home and their greatest fears. More than a few cried. I wrote about these men and was later chastised publicly by a retired general who thought I "aided the enemy" by portraying our soldiers as weak.

I hold a different perspective. Wars are fought by human beings, not Superman carrying  an M-240B machine gun. Showing the military’s soul from time to time goes a long way in mending the disconnect between our servicemembers and a public that often views them through an abstract lens. 

The reality: For those of us from the military community, seeing military leaders tear up at the microphone is not unusual. Farewell toasts, change of command ceremony speeches and memorial service eulogies are often moments when physically and emotionally solid men are caught off guard by their own sentiments. When this happens it’s worth remembering that compassion is a valued trait in military leaders.

So thank you, Gen. Pace for braving a few tears.